You are new to the school, so you get lost and are late to your first class. The professor rolls his eyes when he sees you appear and a student in the back makes a comment about Yankees not being able to tell time.The class period is spent talking about Chinese musical technique and how superior it is to that of Western countries. You remind yourself of all the superb musicians you know back home, but feel a little less confident in your own abilities. One kids piped up "yeah...I mean, if Americans were such good musicians, there would be more of them in the music honors classes here!"
Every head in the room turns to you. They want to know what you will say, how you will react, if you will lash out in anger or get on a soap box. The teacher asks you “what do you Americans think about these issues?” Like you can speak for the whole country.
You want to reminded them that there are only ten American kids in the whole school, that six of them ARE in the honors classes. But the discussion moves on before you can fully articulate your arguments. Do you feel like raising your hand to answer any more of the teachers questions? Do you feel you will have the motivation and confidence to do well on the upcoming exam? Do you feel it will be graded fairly?
Saved by the bell, you find your way to the cafeteria. There, across the room you see two kids sitting a table wearing jeans and t-shirts. The one in the Reds baseball cap is speaking English in stead of Chinese. You feel some relief at seeing them. You sit with them for lunch that day, and the day after that too. You are there in your island of safety in a sea of potential hostility.
After school you go home and plop on the couch to relax in front of the TV. You turn to a sit com. It shows a happy Chinese family and their daily life as normal Chinese citizens. They have this goofy American cowboy neighbor that is always good for a laugh. During the commercial break, there is an ad for a new toy showing happy Chinese parents and their happy Chinese son.
Next, an add for shampoo “to bring out your deep black natural color and emphasize straight beautiful hair.” Your hair is blonde and curly. The next commercial finally has white people in it. They are advertising good old American pie, but the actors on the screen are dressed in overalls and say things like “aint that there a mighty fine piece o’ pie.” Who actually talks like that?
Next, an add for shampoo “to bring out your deep black natural color and emphasize straight beautiful hair.” Your hair is blonde and curly. The next commercial finally has white people in it. They are advertising good old American pie, but the actors on the screen are dressed in overalls and say things like “aint that there a mighty fine piece o’ pie.” Who actually talks like that?
You turn off the TV and take a walk outside. Not too far down the road, a complete stranger stops you. “Your nose is humongous!” what? She pauses, and tries again in a way that you might understand better:
"aint that there a mighty fine schnoz." She wants to touch it. She gets offended when you don’t want her to: “I was just appreciating your heritage.” And even though you think the lady might have meant it as a complement you can’t help wishing you could hide behind a scarf.
"aint that there a mighty fine schnoz." She wants to touch it. She gets offended when you don’t want her to: “I was just appreciating your heritage.” And even though you think the lady might have meant it as a complement you can’t help wishing you could hide behind a scarf.
Now imagine you're not in China. Imagine you are in your own country, where you were born and raised. That country has a history of institutionalizing racism, and you get the short end of it. This isn't vacation, this is home. This is everyday.
This post isn't trying to rag on China, in fact most of my time there was wonderful and I was welcomed and treated well. But those moments when you are reminded of how different others think you are can become exhausting. All the rules seem tailored for someone else and you feel out of place.
I have never had to know what it is like on a daily basis to live in a system of discrimination. A short trip isn't that big of a deal when you know you can retreat back to your comfy white American middle class home at the end.
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This post isn't trying to rag on China, in fact most of my time there was wonderful and I was welcomed and treated well. But those moments when you are reminded of how different others think you are can become exhausting. All the rules seem tailored for someone else and you feel out of place.
I have never had to know what it is like on a daily basis to live in a system of discrimination. A short trip isn't that big of a deal when you know you can retreat back to your comfy white American middle class home at the end.
Follow more conversations about racial justice and Christianity through email or RSS feed.
I think that is the best post yet on communicating that sense of frustration at being in a system that discriminates against those who aren't of the dominant group. Still, do you think there ever comes a danger in generalizing the dominant group to the point where you look at one person and assume they've had it easier because of the color of their skin? People can seem to be in the dominant group and yet have experiences that removes them from it. For instance, the parent raising a kid with Asberger's might seem to be privileged, but there's very little understanding about that situation (and from a documentary I've seen, it's a very tough situation). Could you really be okay just lumping someone with that struggle into the dominant group, which is often dismissed as having no understanding of what it's like to be different and misunderstood on a day to day basis? That parent might not be misunderstood on the basis of skin color, but there's a whole realm of misunderstanding the parent must live in contributed by the parents who have normal kids.
ReplyDeleteDon't know if that communicates anything to you. Just something I've been thinking.
Certainly people in the racial majority can experience hardship and prejudice. No doubt.
ReplyDeleteAsberger's can hit any race. But the white parents will carry a certain amount of privilege with them regardless.
Hopefully the white parents and the black parents have the same access to insurance and health care. Hopefully neither experiences discrimination in trying to get treatment and aid. But the truth is that one family is more likely to get help than the other.
Of course there is pain for both families. Either way, it is rough and it is heartbreaking. It isn't a game of who has it worse in this world. Everyone has struggles, which means everyone is capable of empathy. The extent to which white people to face their own marginalization should help them sympathize all the more with the plights of those even less fortunate.
Everyone has struggles though, no one is denying that.
Ok, I just finished writing this really long, highly intelligent response proving my point (laughs sarcastically) only to find it didn't go through. So this must be life's way of saying that brevity is optimum. But I suck at brevity, so this comment is coming in two, maybe three parts.
ReplyDeleteWhat I'm trying poorly to communicate: sometimes, people use race/class/experience as a reason for shutting down the thought that others not of that dominant group don't know what it's like (it being suffering).
Real life examples to prove that this phenomenon exists.
1. Girl of minority status listens to a panel of people talk about experience of growing up in Appalachia and poverty. Girl then tells one woman that while she may have grown up poor, that woman will always have had and will always have it easier because she doesn't know what it's like to be a part of XXX minority. Meanwhile, others of XX and YY minority think this very distasteful and hurtful. Also, they note that this girl has never known poverty but has had a rich aunt to depend on while growing up.
2. Girl who is a half minority begins to realize she's being excluded by others of the non half minority. When talking with a friend who isn't half, the friend tells her, "Well, you don't really know what it's like. You didn't really have the same experiences and all that." And the girl who has grown up in the same kind of neighborhood and had (in her words) the same experiences realizes that she isn't included to as many events and social gatherings because she's half and doesn't understand. (true story, not mine).
3. Me, having lost my dad to cancer at an early age (sky turns dark with the tragedy of that incident), I've grown up coveting the people who knew two parent families and even the privilege of having parents who were divorced. In high school, I had the annoying job of listening to my best friend complain every day about her dad and the way he was treating her. How dare she? She had a dad. And so her life was automatically (in my head) much better. So one day, I went off on her and she of course shut down. In the kind of mentality I had (and still have to some extent), there was no room for me to admit that while she of the coveted two parent family might have struggles that I don't understand (and my limited understanding now means that I can to some extent recognize how having a dad can be somewhat painful at times).
And while there are other examples I could site, I think you get the idea. At least, I hope you do.
End of part 1....
Part 2...
ReplyDeleteSo, it's true. I don't know what it's like to have to face the daily systemic inequalities that our system deals out to minorities (my halfness has always been deligitimized by my appearance). But I know what it feels like to be on the receiving end of an attitude that says I don't know what it's like to have suffered because I'm in some sense a part of the dominant group. Well, maybe in some way, I am. But that doesn't mean I have the same reference point/background experience/ privilege as everyone in that group. To prove my point, I ask you to go through your recent comment and look at how many time you use the word "parents." Not just parent (implying one parent). Isn't that an example of you asserting a dominant group trait where you just assume these kids have two parents families? And would it be right of me to hold that over you and cut you off because you don't understand how often I've had to deal with the common assumption that kids come from two parent families (or divorces ones where the other partner actually helps out) and all the privileges that implies? I think not. I don't even understand all the single parent family experiences or divorce. I just have my reference point.
I'm sorry if that is rather hurtful. It just sucks to be in a world where people can use their experience of something to completely delegitimize the suffering of others (something I'm working on in myself and not in this moment having much success). That human problem is what I hope to have addressed rather poorly in my first comment because having been on both sides, I think it just absolutely sucks.
Final thought: you have in your article the assumption that being middle class means returning to a comfy home. In my experience, that is a far cry from being true of every middle class kid. It might be more idealic on the surface, but not problem free and far from always being comfy. Take the mc kid who comes home to the mc father beating the mc wife. Or the mc kid that comes home to nothing every day and spends a bulk of time in complete isolation. Or a thousand other problems that mean that home isn't comfy. But hey, being mc, that means being problem free, right?
This comment really isn't brief or ignorance free, is it? Looking forward to your thoughts.
I love the dialogue and discussion. It is wonderful soul work for me, you, and anyone else that reads. Have courage to ask hard questions and know this is a place of love and not condemnation.
ReplyDeleteThe struggles of those descending from Appalachian populations is one that I have learned a lot more about since moving to Columbus. A lot of people at our church identify with that demographic. They are often ignored when it comes to discussions of poverty and disadvantage. It thin they are also the victims of condemnation…like “you’re white…what’s your excuse for your situation?” That being said, if a person does manage to overcome adversity, go to college, make money etc., they are still stuck with their skin color. Rich and black might be better than poor and black, but it doesn’t change the system of discrimination you face. On the other hand, poor white people that make it to college can “pass” easier as “mainstream” majority. For better or worse that is the situation in which we find ourselves. These issue also comes up in the context of socioeconomic vs. race-base approaches to affirmative action.
As for your second point, there is TONS of stuff to talk about when it comes to biracial people. For a glimpse for starters, Dr. Tatum talks at length about it in her book “Why are all the black people sitting together in the Cafeteria” The hurt and prejudice can go and come from all directions. Add in all the prejudices against mix marriages and it gets real messy. It brings in all sorts of issues like “the one drop rule” and has its own unique flavors of racism associated with it. I am not trying to avoid the topic, that is all I will say about it for the moment (maybe a later post). Just saying it deserves its own discussion (many in fact) all together.
ReplyDeleteYour points about family structure are great. In this particular case the mother father structure was intentional, because it reflected the very triunal heteronormative ideal that the Chinese advertisements were promoting. They were normative in all sorts of ways...family structure, gender bias (for sons), nationality, all in addition to race.
I think it is important to point out (in love) all of the kinds of privilege people have, but don't themselves recognize. It helps the person of privilege understand it and in many case (like in having wealth or sound mental health) encourages them to be thankful to God for their blessings and to in turn use that privilege for the good of others. That being said, we must be careful not to fall into the all-too-common trap of derailing a discussion about race in such a way that overlooks or diminishes the racism being discussed at the time. These issues are important, of course, but can sometimes be outside of, or simply in addition to, the topic at hand.
Should someone of less privilege "hold it over" the other as a grudge or use it to discount the privileged person’s experiences or feelings? Of course not. Everyone is the owner of their own experience. That cannot/should not be taken away. That isn't at all what I have been recommending here. Nor is it a good plan to get caught up in arguments about who suffers the most on this earth. It is a broken world and we all have pain. Jesus even guaranties were will find misfortune (John 16:33 ). Certainly, some people get caught in a victim mentality that doesn't help anyone and can just lead to more agitation and misunderstanding, but that doesn't change the systematic truth that underlies the unjust situation under which that person suffer. In the same way, neither does it detract from anyone else’s suffering.
ReplyDeleteAs for the comfy middle class environment...I did mention several times that the blog entry is based on my personal experience, which is indeed founded on a comfy middle class home. The same principle applies here as with your Asperger's example above. You can be middle class and have an abusive father, or you can be dirt poor and have an abusive father. Both suck. But there is still an additional privilege for the mc family. I am not denying the rough situation for EITHER family. Socioeconomic status (or race) is just another element that is thrown into the mix on a different axis/continuum. Again, loneliness can strike someone with any size bank account (or lack their of). That does not change the fact that a given lonely person might have more privileged in one area, and less privilege in another area of life than any second lonely person does.
Just because this blog doesn't address all the injustices out there, doesn't mean that they are unimportant. For this blog, I focus on Christianity and race because I believe God has given me a passion and an understanding for its intricacies and because I believe it is one of the major short comings of the modern Church. That being said, there are certainly many other issues for the Church to work out and I am sure discussion on those subject is merited. I see a new blog in the future for you, Mel?
Should someone of less privilege "hold it over" the other as a grudge or use it to discount the privileged person’s experiences or feelings? Of course not. Everyone is the owner of their own experience. That cannot/should not be taken away. That isn't at all what I have been recommending here. Nor is it a good plan to get caught up in arguments about who suffers the most on this earth. It is a broken world and we all have pain. Jesus even guaranties were will find misfortune (John 16:33 ). Certainly, some people get caught in a victim mentality that doesn't help anyone and can just lead to more agitation and misunderstanding, but that doesn't change the systematic truth that underlies the unjust situation under which that person suffer. In the same way, neither should it detract from anyone else’s suffering.
ReplyDeleteAs for the comfy middle class environment...I did mention several times that the blog entry is based on my personal experience, which is indeed founded on a comfy middle class home. The same principle applies here as with your Asperger's example above. You can be middle class and have an abusive father, or you can be dirt poor and have an abusive father. Both suck. But there is still an additional privilege for the mc family. I am not denying the rough situation for EITHER family. Socioeconomic status (or race) is just another element that is thrown into the mix on a different axis/continuum. Again, loneliness can strike someone with any size bank account (or lack their of). That does not change the fact that a given lonely person might have more privileged in one area, and less privilege in another area of life than any second lonely person does.
ReplyDeleteJust because this blog doesn't address all the injustices out there, doesn't mean that they are unimportant. For this blog, I focus on Christianity and race because I believe God has given me a passion and an understanding for its intricacies and because I believe it is one of the major short comings of the modern Church. That being said, there are certainly many other issues for the Church to work out and I am sure discussion on those subject is merited. I see a new blog in the future for you, Mel?
So clearly there is a character limit here. Not sure that there is anything I can do about it. Sorry about that folks.
ReplyDeleteOk, so this is what I'm taking away from your insights. Mostly, to correct in love (note to self for future reference). Second, though I read your earlier stuff, I forgot that you were basing it on your own experience. Third, I see what you mean about not letting a discussion derail from the main topic and see how my comment might not exactly fall into the point that you're trying to express. Still, some things just stew the can of worms from within and I just wanted to voice something that when discussing racism never seems to be talked about. And I thought I perceived something in your article that hit that spot. Maybe a false perception? Maybe a blind spot? I don't know. Thanks for the insight. I'm hoping my hubby posts something on your blog as we've just had a discussion and I have his viewpoint, but don't have a perspective that you undoubtedly have on this issue.
ReplyDeleteGlad to hear more discussions are happening. I appreciate your frustrations with discussions about race and am glad you felt you could air some of them here. It is important for EVERYONE to have an opportunity to safely express themselves. I know I have felt frustrated in the past when I don't get that opportunity/ was too worried about PCness to voice my concerns. It can be tough. This is one of the reasons, I often think there needs to be times for people of privilege to gather and discuss the implications of their position together, so that confusion and frustration can be worked out without the fear of being shot down that may come from mixed group discussions. Lets keep the dialogs going.
ReplyDeleteOnce again, Abagond delivers on point! His own take on a similar analogy: http://abagond.wordpress.com/2011/01/26/true-reverse-racism/#comment-78589
ReplyDeleteGlad to hear more discussions are happening. I appreciate your frustrations with discussions about race and am glad you felt you could air some of them here. It is important for EVERYONE to have an opportunity to safely express themselves. I know I have felt frustrated in the past when I don't get that opportunity/ was too worried about PCness to voice my concerns. It can be tough. This is one of the reasons, I often think there needs to be times for people of privilege to gather and discuss the implications of their position together, so that confusion and frustration can be worked out without the fear of being shot down that may come from mixed group discussions. Lets keep the dialogs going.
ReplyDeleteShould someone of less privilege "hold it over" the other as a grudge or use it to discount the privileged person’s experiences or feelings? Of course not. Everyone is the owner of their own experience. That cannot/should not be taken away. That isn't at all what I have been recommending here. Nor is it a good plan to get caught up in arguments about who suffers the most on this earth. It is a broken world and we all have pain. Jesus even guaranties were will find misfortune (John 16:33 ). Certainly, some people get caught in a victim mentality that doesn't help anyone and can just lead to more agitation and misunderstanding, but that doesn't change the systematic truth that underlies the unjust situation under which that person suffer. In the same way, neither does it detract from anyone else’s suffering.
ReplyDeleteAs for the comfy middle class environment...I did mention several times that the blog entry is based on my personal experience, which is indeed founded on a comfy middle class home. The same principle applies here as with your Asperger's example above. You can be middle class and have an abusive father, or you can be dirt poor and have an abusive father. Both suck. But there is still an additional privilege for the mc family. I am not denying the rough situation for EITHER family. Socioeconomic status (or race) is just another element that is thrown into the mix on a different axis/continuum. Again, loneliness can strike someone with any size bank account (or lack their of). That does not change the fact that a given lonely person might have more privileged in one area, and less privilege in another area of life than any second lonely person does.
Just because this blog doesn't address all the injustices out there, doesn't mean that they are unimportant. For this blog, I focus on Christianity and race because I believe God has given me a passion and an understanding for its intricacies and because I believe it is one of the major short comings of the modern Church. That being said, there are certainly many other issues for the Church to work out and I am sure discussion on those subject is merited. I see a new blog in the future for you, Mel?
Ok, so this is what I'm taking away from your insights. Mostly, to correct in love (note to self for future reference). Second, though I read your earlier stuff, I forgot that you were basing it on your own experience. Third, I see what you mean about not letting a discussion derail from the main topic and see how my comment might not exactly fall into the point that you're trying to express. Still, some things just stew the can of worms from within and I just wanted to voice something that when discussing racism never seems to be talked about. And I thought I perceived something in your article that hit that spot. Maybe a false perception? Maybe a blind spot? I don't know. Thanks for the insight. I'm hoping my hubby posts something on your blog as we've just had a discussion and I have his viewpoint, but don't have a perspective that you undoubtedly have on this issue.
ReplyDeleteAs for your second point, there is TONS of stuff to talk about when it comes to biracial people. For a glimpse for starters, Dr. Tatum talks at length about it in her book “Why are all the black people sitting together in the Cafeteria” The hurt and prejudice can go and come from all directions. Add in all the prejudices against mix marriages and it gets real messy. It brings in all sorts of issues like “the one drop rule” and has its own unique flavors of racism associated with it. I am not trying to avoid the topic, that is all I will say about it for the moment (maybe a later post). Just saying it deserves its own discussion (many in fact) all together.
ReplyDeleteYour points about family structure are great. In this particular case the mother father structure was intentional, because it reflected the very triunal heteronormative ideal that the Chinese advertisements were promoting. They were normative in all sorts of ways...family structure, gender bias (for sons), nationality, all in addition to race.
I think it is important to point out (in love) all of the kinds of privilege people have, but don't themselves recognize. It helps the person of privilege understand it and in many case (like in having wealth or sound mental health) encourages them to be thankful to God for their blessings and to in turn use that privilege for the good of others. That being said, we must be careful not to fall into the all-too-common trap of derailing a discussion about race in such a way that overlooks or diminishes the racism being discussed at the time. These issues are important, of course, but can sometimes be outside of, or simply in addition to, the topic at hand.
Part 2...
ReplyDeleteSo, it's true. I don't know what it's like to have to face the daily systemic inequalities that our system deals out to minorities (my halfness has always been deligitimized by my appearance). But I know what it feels like to be on the receiving end of an attitude that says I don't know what it's like to have suffered because I'm in some sense a part of the dominant group. Well, maybe in some way, I am. But that doesn't mean I have the same reference point/background experience/ privilege as everyone in that group. To prove my point, I ask you to go through your recent comment and look at how many time you use the word "parents." Not just parent (implying one parent). Isn't that an example of you asserting a dominant group trait where you just assume these kids have two parents families? And would it be right of me to hold that over you and cut you off because you don't understand how often I've had to deal with the common assumption that kids come from two parent families (or divorces ones where the other partner actually helps out) and all the privileges that implies? I think not. I don't even understand all the single parent family experiences or divorce. I just have my reference point.
I'm sorry if that is rather hurtful. It just sucks to be in a world where people can use their experience of something to completely delegitimize the suffering of others (something I'm working on in myself and not in this moment having much success). That human problem is what I hope to have addressed rather poorly in my first comment because having been on both sides, I think it just absolutely sucks.
Final thought: you have in your article the assumption that being middle class means returning to a comfy home. In my experience, that is a far cry from being true of every middle class kid. It might be more idealic on the surface, but not problem free and far from always being comfy. Take the mc kid who comes home to the mc father beating the mc wife. Or the mc kid that comes home to nothing every day and spends a bulk of time in complete isolation. Or a thousand other problems that mean that home isn't comfy. But hey, being mc, that means being problem free, right?
This comment really isn't brief or ignorance free, is it? Looking forward to your thoughts.
I love the dialogue and discussion. It is wonderful soul work for me, you, and anyone else that reads. Have courage to ask hard questions and know this is a place of love and not condemnation.
ReplyDeleteThe struggles of those descending from Appalachian populations is one that I have learned a lot more about since moving to Columbus. A lot of people at our church identify with that demographic. They are often ignored when it comes to discussions of poverty and disadvantage. It thin they are also the victims of condemnation…like “you’re white…what’s your excuse for your situation?” That being said, if a person does manage to overcome adversity, go to college, make money etc., they are still stuck with their skin color. Rich and black might be better than poor and black, but it doesn’t change the system of discrimination you face. On the other hand, poor white people that make it to college can “pass” easier as “mainstream” majority. For better or worse that is the situation in which we find ourselves. These issue also comes up in the context of socioeconomic vs. race-base approaches to affirmative action.
I think that is the best post yet on communicating that sense of frustration at being in a system that discriminates against those who aren't of the dominant group. Still, do you think there ever comes a danger in generalizing the dominant group to the point where you look at one person and assume they've had it easier because of the color of their skin? People can seem to be in the dominant group and yet have experiences that removes them from it. For instance, the parent raising a kid with Asberger's might seem to be privileged, but there's very little understanding about that situation (and from a documentary I've seen, it's a very tough situation). Could you really be okay just lumping someone with that struggle into the dominant group, which is often dismissed as having no understanding of what it's like to be different and misunderstood on a day to day basis? That parent might not be misunderstood on the basis of skin color, but there's a whole realm of misunderstanding the parent must live in contributed by the parents who have normal kids.
ReplyDeleteDon't know if that communicates anything to you. Just something I've been thinking.
Certainly people in the racial majority can experience hardship and prejudice. No doubt.
ReplyDeleteAsberger's can hit any race. But the white parents will carry a certain amount of privilege with them regardless.
Hopefully the white parents and the black parents have the same access to insurance and health care. Hopefully neither experiences discrimination in trying to get treatment and aid. But the truth is that one family is more likely to get help than the other.
Of course there is pain for both families. Either way, it is rough and it is heartbreaking. It isn't a game of who has it worse in this world. Everyone has struggles, which means everyone is capable of empathy. The extent to which white people to face their own marginalization should help them sympathize all the more with the plights of those even less fortunate.
Everyone has struggles though, no one is denying that.
I love the dialogue and discussion. It is wonderful soul work for me, you, and anyone else that reads. Have courage to ask hard questions and know this is a place of love and not condemnation.
ReplyDeleteThe struggles of those descending from Appalachian populations is one that I have learned a lot more about since moving to Columbus. A lot of people at our church identify with that demographic. They are often ignored when it comes to discussions of poverty and disadvantage. It thin they are also the victims of condemnation…like “you’re white…what’s your excuse for your situation?” That being said, if a person does manage to overcome adversity, go to college, make money etc., they are still stuck with their skin color. Rich and black might be better than poor and black, but it doesn’t change the system of discrimination you face. On the other hand, poor white people that make it to college can “pass” easier as “mainstream” majority. For better or worse that is the situation in which we find ourselves. These issue also comes up in the context of socioeconomic vs. race-base approaches to affirmative action.
As for your second point, there is TONS of stuff to talk about when it comes to biracial people. For a glimpse for starters, Dr. Tatum talks at length about it in her book “Why are all the black people sitting together in the Cafeteria” The hurt and prejudice can go and come from all directions. Add in all the prejudices against mix marriages and it gets real messy. It brings in all sorts of issues like “the one drop rule” and has its own unique flavors of racism associated with it. I am not trying to avoid the topic, that is all I will say about it for the moment (maybe a later post). Just saying it deserves its own discussion (many in fact) all together.
ReplyDeleteYour points about family structure are great. In this particular case the mother father structure was intentional, because it reflected the very triunal heteronormative ideal that the Chinese advertisements were promoting. They were normative in all sorts of ways...family structure, gender bias (for sons), nationality, all in addition to race.
I think it is important to point out (in love) all of the kinds of privilege people have, but don't themselves recognize. It helps the person of privilege understand it and in many case (like in having wealth or sound mental health) encourages them to be thankful to God for their blessings and to in turn use that privilege for the good of others. That being said, we must be careful not to fall into the all-too-common trap of derailing a discussion about race in such a way that overlooks or diminishes the racism being discussed at the time. These issues are important, of course, but can sometimes be outside of, or simply in addition to, the topic at hand.
Should someone of less privilege "hold it over" the other as a grudge or use it to discount the privileged person’s experiences or feelings? Of course not. Everyone is the owner of their own experience. That cannot/should not be taken away. That isn't at all what I have been recommending here. Nor is it a good plan to get caught up in arguments about who suffers the most on this earth. It is a broken world and we all have pain. Jesus even guaranties were will find misfortune (John 16:33 ). Certainly, some people get caught in a victim mentality that doesn't help anyone and can just lead to more agitation and misunderstanding, but that doesn't change the systematic truth that underlies the unjust situation under which that person suffer. In the same way, neither does it detract from anyone else’s suffering.
ReplyDeleteAs for the comfy middle class environment...I did mention several times that the blog entry is based on my personal experience, which is indeed founded on a comfy middle class home. The same principle applies here as with your Asperger's example above. You can be middle class and have an abusive father, or you can be dirt poor and have an abusive father. Both suck. But there is still an additional privilege for the mc family. I am not denying the rough situation for EITHER family. Socioeconomic status (or race) is just another element that is thrown into the mix on a different axis/continuum. Again, loneliness can strike someone with any size bank account (or lack their of). That does not change the fact that a given lonely person might have more privileged in one area, and less privilege in another area of life than any second lonely person does.
Just because this blog doesn't address all the injustices out there, doesn't mean that they are unimportant. For this blog, I focus on Christianity and race because I believe God has given me a passion and an understanding for its intricacies and because I believe it is one of the major short comings of the modern Church. That being said, there are certainly many other issues for the Church to work out and I am sure discussion on those subject is merited. I see a new blog in the future for you, Mel?
Glad to hear more discussions are happening. I appreciate your frustrations with discussions about race and am glad you felt you could air some of them here. It is important for EVERYONE to have an opportunity to safely express themselves. I know I have felt frustrated in the past when I don't get that opportunity/ was too worried about PCness to voice my concerns. It can be tough. This is one of the reasons, I often think there needs to be times for people of privilege to gather and discuss the implications of their position together, so that confusion and frustration can be worked out without the fear of being shot down that may come from mixed group discussions. Lets keep the dialogs going.
ReplyDeleteA couple of years ago, a musicological research grant funded me on a trip to Shanghai, China. Although there are obvious differences, my experience gave me a glimpse of the privilege I take for granted as a member of the racial majority while in the United States. The above is a composite of several weeks of experiences. Keep in mind, this was brief trip, every aspect was completely voluntary, and on the whole I found myself welcomed and respected. The metaphor isn't perfect, particularly because I knew I could leave the situation at anytime and I had a foundation of security from having grown up as a member of the majority. Additionally, in this specific situation, much of the tension was political and not racial (though one's race will still affect your international experience outside of the USA and how readily people identify you as American). But, you get the idea--it's about feeling singled out because someone thinks you are different.
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